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Abduction and Abuse)
Learn the Ten “Kid Power” Rules!
The following rules are taught on video and are available for $199.00 for all three age groups or $99.00 for each individual age group. The age groups are: verbal to starting school, starting school to grade 5 or 6, grade 5 or 6 to adult. To order a video, please call us in Toronto, 1-88-966-6606 outside Toronto and in the U.S., and 001-416-968-0640 in Europe.
1. TAKE TWO GREAT BIG STEPS BACK!
People often drive up to children and seek directions. It is still O.K. to offer directions, but only after they take two great big steps back. Most abductors/molesters are cowards (why else would they do what they are doing), so they are not very likely to go chasing a child through a church parking lot or through the park. Remember – if you see a child who merely appears to have been grabbed, or chased, or tricked – it’s O.K. to interrupt and go up to the child and ask, “Is this your father? (mother?)”.
2. I WON’T GO WITH SOMEONE I DON’T KNOW
Tell your child it doesn’t matter how nice this person seems. And, it doesn’t matter if this person says he or she is a teacher, or a doctor, or from the fire department, or the police. It is not your child’s job to decide if this is a good person or not. The only job of a child who is asked to go with someone he or she doesn’t know is to follow this Kid Power rule. Keep reminding your child that this is one of those times when it is O.K. to say “NO!” to what an adult wants.
3. ADULTS SHOULD SEEK HELP FROM OTHER ADULTS – NOT FROM KIDS
What if someone really has lost a kitten or a puppy – and even has a picture of it? What if a man or woman really has a cast on his or her leg and needs our help to carry things? The answer for our children is to go and get Mom or Dad, of the teacher, or some other adult that our child knows. The way a child can best help an adult is to go and get another adult. Then, it is the job of this other adult to help out when a child comes to get them. Make sure you tell your child about the times you have helped others in the past when called upon, so that he or she knows you will do something to help if you are asked.
4. ALWAYS HAVE A FAMILY PASSWORD
Don’t leave home without it! Sit down as a family and invent a word or group of words (phrase) that only your family knows. It can be three words or even on word in up to three parts (syllables). You can use a nonsense word, or a word from a foreign language that the child is used to. Then, when you must leave a message for your child to change pickup plans or transportation plans at school or camp, or wherever, make sure you use the family password. Most importantly, TELL your children they MUST NOT go with someone they don’t know unless that person says the “secret” family password. Once a password has been used one time, then find another to replace it. Don’t allow your password to be used on a school list, or any other list. By the way – one secret a child is allowed to keep, even from their friends, is the family password.
5. NEVER DISPLAY YOUR NAME
Some people have their names showing on their clothing – bowling shirts, theatre jackets, team sweaters and caps. For a child, this is NOT SAFE. People can pretend to know a child by becoming familiar with a child’s first or last name. A child’s guard might go down, just when it should stay up. When sending a child to school or camp, put his or her name on the inside of clothing. That way, a piece of clothing that belongs to your child can still be spotted, but with just a little extra effort. It’s worth it.
6. KIDS CAN’T SIGN CONTRACTS
Real talent agents know that the only people in this world who can sign contracts are adults. If a child puts his or her name on a contract, it doesn’t mean they will ever have to do anything. Tell your child that. Now, some people may say to a child, “You look so good, you should be on T.V. … or, you’re so special, or so talented.” And all it seems they want a child to do is go with them to have his or her picture taken. They may want a child to go and perform somewhere, or get a picture taken at some other place. Then, they are told they can surprise Mom or Dad. They may even ask a child to sign a contract so that everybody can get lots of money! If someone like this approaches a child, the right thing to do it to get their business card and take it home to his or her parents. But, remind your child of the Kid Power rule. No matter what, I still won’t go with someone I don’t know.
7. DON’T GO IN WITHOUT YOUR PARENT’S PERMISSION
…even if this is a new and very special friend … even if it is very cold or very hot outside. “Go home and ask your parents’ permission”. Tell them, then, as their parents that you will phone the family. Then, Make arrangements to go over and meet this new friend and family. This even includes those times when children are collecting for trips or charity or newspapers. Here is a note for adults who know that they, themselves, are people who can be trusted. Don’t invite children you’ve just met into your home. It might get those children used to trusting people they have just met, and there may be others who are not as trustworthy as yourself.
8. HANDS OFF THE BATHING SUIT AREA
Nobody should be touching this area. If children are old enough to listen to instructions, then it is time for them to start bathing themselves under supervision. Parents and physicians and nurses should also respect the bathing suit area as a place not to touch unless necessary, and then health professionals should invite another health professional into the room if an examination is to take place. Remember, if anybody touches a child in the bathing suit area, or if a child is asked to touch an adult in the bathing suit area, it still means “Hands Off”, and that child must be encouraged to tell at least two people. (Please note: We have spent a lot of time trying to decide how to describe the area not to be touched. The bathing suit area is very familiar to children, and no fancy medical terms – or street words – need to be used.)
9. IT’S O.K. TO TELL THE BAD SECRETS
When you think of it, there are very few good secrets. Maybe, when your child does not mention the name of the person his or her friend really likes a lot. Or, maybe, keeping secrets about surprise gifts. But most of the other secrets are bad ones – especially touching in the bathing suit areas. So, when someone says to a child, “Don’t tell anyone”, let them know it really means, “Go tell at least two people as soon as possible”. After all, it’s such an important bad secret, it’s not enough to just tell one person. Children need to know in advance that the people who touch them in the bathing suit area may say that they will do something horrible to someone or something the child loves. Or, that they can do magic to hurt people. Explain, “Don’t believe them! They’re just fakes. People who really love you will protect you.” And one last thing … if the person who touches a child is someone who usually shows them love, they must still tell the bad secret to two people. Why? Because, when they are being touched in the bathing suit area – at that moment it’s not real love, it’s fake love.
10. A WEAPON MEANS SCREAM, KICK, YELL AND RUN
Have you ever heard of a child being shot in the back while running from someone who was trying to abduct him or her? Not likely. If everything a person does has to have a purpose, then a possible abductor defeats his own purpose if he kills his intended victim. This is why we must tell children to scream and kick, and yell and run … but never give in to a weapon. Even if a gun or a knife or other weapon is used as a threat, the rule is still I WON’T GO WITH SOMEONE I DON’T KNOW.
You can order a video kit that demonstrates all the rules for $199.00 plus $14 shipping or to learn more you can call 416-968-0640 in Toronto, 1-888-966-6606 outside Toronto and in the U.S., and 001-416-968-0640 in Europe .